Anonymous said: Question post: 3, 37, 86. (Was this supposed to be done in 3's?)
I honestly have no idea! LOL (about being done in 3’s)
3. Last text message “someone else might have accessed Microsoft account email@example.com revcover at blah blah blah”
37. Nicknames: In highschool and beyond it was Moho, but typically it’s Irish, or McIrish or Irish Matt.
86. Yourself (as in do you believe in): hardest question yet. Right now? No. I want to quit. I want to just go away, and leave it all behind. But I can’t. I’ve responsibilities. There are things only I can take care of, only things that I can do… but it’s freaking hard. I try, every day, I try… but when it comes to the end of the day.. I didn’t accomplish it. So I fight. I fight to not cry every day. I fight to not give up everyday. I fight to get up in the mornings, I fight to go to bed at night, I fight to make lunch, dinner (I’ve given up on breakfast). I fight to wait to have that drink until 5pm (cocktail hour woot woot!). It drains me. It leaves me empty. It makes my default emotion anger, resentment, irritability. Lack of everything, and being tired of being depressed, sad, unable to do things like drive a motorcycle or play xobox with friends for more than an hour without drinking… Do I believe in myself? I don’t know. I’ve learned that “you can do whatever you set your mind to” is a lie… after all, I’ve never achieved flight or magnetism or the ability to pick winning lottery numbers…. Do I exist? Yes. Why? I don’t know. I used to believe that I existed to be a part of certain people lives… to enhance their lives and either move on, or have enough of a reward to maintain them in my life…Do I believe in myself? I don’t know. I only know I can’t do what I used to do, so I KNOW that I can’t do anything I set my mind to.